I am a sucker for orange juice. I am obsessed with orange juice. Orange juice is amazing. It's the best thing on earth. It's the nicest thing to drink during flights and in between lectures. It's the only thing to drink as you curl up on your bed to die. Ah, what would I do without orange juice.

I am overdosing on Nettie. It says on my prescription to take Nettie once a week, for 2 hours. But I somehow got a bit addicted to my medication and took Nettie two times this week for countless hours. Also Nettie is a bit costly to me. Because of my Nettie OD-ing and addiction I've got no money left for the week! AHHH.

I think, this week despite many setbacks, emotional turmoils and a lot of shit to tahan, it's been good. I meant it was only good when I met Nettie, slumped myself in the most comfy Starbucks while slurping a Java Chip (finally!) and just talking for hours, like literally exhausted ourselves catching up with each other, talking about boys and first kisses and things that made us feel warm insideeeeeee. And wow, Siam Kitchen and some shitty chicken thingy and ramen and donuts sure made me feel lovedddd if not fat, but otherwise lovedddd by nettienettienettie. We were up there, just a few hours ago at Vivo, around us were couples in love, and we were walking there eating donuts not caring whether we'd get fat or we had boys in our lives (well Nettie has a boy but it's okay Rafhana is still her number one lover.)

Ahh and then I was in the bus alone for over an hour just staring into the world outside, staring into the sequence of events that has happened and how messed up my life is, how no more 'good morning, how are you?' messages that came anymore to brighten up my day and how my wants have become so simple, like a smile from someone could complete my day. I think when life is that sad, you try to pick up anything, however small it is, like catching a whiff of someone's smell or see them smiling genuinely could mean something to your life, even if it makes you happy for a few hours. Sometimes it's important for us to realise how important we are in other people's life. I'm a sucker for emo posts too.

Labels: addiction, food, friends, happy talk, i swear i'm trying to get better, pondering