Saturday, 1-07
1100 hrs

A battalion of ants swarm the entire village, stealing food and tormenting the children. What an ugly sight. They had invented a new suit of armour and their humongous black bodies ensured they were fit soldiers. Women and children cry for help. The men are stomping desperately, fighting for their lives. Mad, mad! The village is in a state of sheer madness.

The commander gathered our troops. War has been declared. Humanity vs. EvilCreaturesWhichWillNotBeNamed(ECWWNBN). Oh, the horrifying destruction of humanity.

“FIGHT!” our soldiers yell amongst the sounds of distorted screaming and pleas of help. Kicking, crying, screaming. Much blood has been shed due to excessive scratching. These ants bite.

Nasty buggers. I’ll kill all of you warmongering feisty intruders. Get away from my land, my home. AR! Save the women and children.

By chance they must have mutated, to have grown so big, and they endured the gas that we prescribed to them. We need a higher concentration of gas. Yes, yes! Bring on the poison! Deadly.

Death to ECWWNBN!

1200 hrs

The ground is littered with black bodies, their skinny legs twitching helplessly above their bodies. Death looms above them. Hahahaha. Victory for the humankind.

1230 hrs
The Notebook ridded me of my exhaustion. Must write to dear Keeper. Must…kiss…Keeper…now.

Sunday, 2-07
0100 hrs

The Portugese successfully brought down the English troops. Happy?

HELL YES.

1000 hrs

Missing LB terribly. I wish I could write to Vicky, but will not. She would probably reply with ‘yeah but, no but, yeah but, no but, yeah…’ and shipping would probably be expensive because she can‘t shut up.

Keep seeing Keeper every time I march pass a palm tree. It’s the cold-turkey Keeper treatment for me. War is such a cunt. Wish ECWWNBN would stop attacking us.

1030 hrs

Our troops is being attacked by ECWWNBN again. This time it is a HUGE pale coloured lizard. It eats up 5 men. I collapse on the battlefield. The ugliness and ickyness of ECWWNBN sends me to first aid.

1700 hrs

ECWWNBN sneaks into the headquarters. A spy!

I sprayed it with harmless water and it is hiding somewhere.

1944 hrs

Missing Keeper. Wants to go home as soon as possible. Curse ECWWNBN! A pox on them!